Wednesday, September 7, 2011

As summer becomes a memory...

So as the summertime floats away to a distant memory I sit taking a look back at the sun filled days on the beach, or the busy days spent at work, but most of all my mind takes me to look at the days filled with betrayal, heart break, and sadness. Summer should be about fun n’ the sun with your best friends having the time of your life, it should be a time of enjoyment, and a time of celebration of the past year. But this summer for me was about hurt and sorrow. This summer showed me that you really can’t trust anyone. I had planned to do so much this past summer, in the end only a few things actually happened. Yeah, I went to the beach as planned, I worked at the oasis, and I grew a strong relationship with my boyfriend. But what didn’t happen was the 13.1 miles I was supposed to run with a girl I called my sister, or having the summer on my life. Now I guess I will start at the beginning of what was supposed to be “the summer of my life”.

The trip to the beach was the perfect start to the summer. The thrill of going on my first trip alone was amazing, the first time we got to decide what to do every day; where to eat, where to shop, and where to hang out. I thought for sure this trip was foreshadowing the rest of the summer, but soon on the arrival back to North Texas reality kicked in. I had gone through a nasty break up with an ex in the middle of spring semester and its drama continued into the summer. This ex got in a motorcycle wreck, I got involved trying to be there for his mom. I’ll make this long story short somehow through the wreck this ex and my “best friend” got involved. The shocking part is that she didn’t even like and and talked trash on him for what he had done to me. But soon enough I caught on to the betrayal she was committing. I would catch her at his house late at night, refusing to answer my calls. Soon all I could do was let go and re-focus on my life and my goals, I had tried to be there for this ex and his family but it was apparent that I wasn’t needed. I have an amazing relationship that I was starting to jeopardize and I wasn’t going to let that happen.  Getting through that ordeal was hard, to get burned by someone you trusted your life with hurts, to me it was like my sister stabbing me in the back. Moving on from that situation I kept my head up and surrounded me with a close group I did everything with. My boyfriend and my “second mom” and her daughter would go out on the lake and have a blast. I did succeed in learning how to wakeboard, now I’m not great at it but I have time to work on it! Work kept me busy all the time as did spending basically all my spare time with my boyfriend and occasionally with my oldest brother’s family. August rolled around and my oldest brother ended up having a little girl on August 4th. I started getting ready for school, and again reality kicked in and I had to start preparing to leave my boyfriend of 6 months back at home while I went to school in Canyon. Though it’s not easy only relying on phone calls, text messages, and skype we manage.

Now that the summer has come to a close and I have looked back I know that many things were learned this summer. I hope that in the soon future the betrayal can be forgiven and I can have a sister to talk to again, however if that does not happen I know I will be ok because I have strong people I can lean on surrounding me. This past summer has shown me that no matter how well you think you know someone you won’t really know who they are till you’re in a rough spot. I thank God every day for the strength that he has given me to move forward and be happy in my life. I’m so thankful for my boyfriend because he has stuck beside me through all the ups and downs, he has helped me stand back up when I didn’t think I had the strength to do it on my own, he has wiped away the tears that came flowing down and managed to always put a smile on my face. I thank all my friends and family for being there for me when I needed ya’ll most, for standing beside me on the ups and downs. 

No comments:

Post a Comment